I Didn’t Know I Was Anxious

I’m not sure I really knew what mental health was until junior high. And even then I had a conceived idea of mental health that was so far from it’s actuality. I perceived anxiety and depression as something that only touched unhinged people. Even as I grew up and was able to understand that mental disorders effect all kinds of people I still put up a barrier between me and those people. I was ignorant because It was something that was never talked about in my house growing up.

My sophomore year of high school I had my first memorable panic attack, however at the time I didn’t understand that’s what it was. I didn’t fully grasp that I had anxiety until my sister went to the hospital because she felt like she was having a heart attack and the doctor prescribed her anxiety medication. It clicked in my head that I have had similar reactions and thoughts. I’m still struggling I deal with my anxiety because of the implications of going to a psychiatrist. It’s hard to make a step in the right direction when you don’t necessarily feel supported by those around you. However, I’ve been able to cope in my own way and create my own paths for subsiding my anxiety in bad moments.