Addiction

I had lost a couple of loved ones due to a Hanness disease. I could not truly find a way to fill this void and the only way that seemed to help was drinking myself to sleep every single night. I would wake up go to school hungover hating myself, but I always had this fake happy smile but at the end of the day I just wanted to leave and get away and be alone. I found myself being cut throat and not taking any bull shit from people which in its own way helped me. But once I figured out that drinking every night that I was finishing bottle before I could replace them. I then turned to certain drugs that give me momentary relief from the agony and pain of the loss but also I found myself accutally enjoying drinking and being able to drive from parking garage to parking garage to drink with friends in the middle of the night. But lately I have stopped caring started working on myself and watching what I consume and doing what I think is truly best for me.